It Takes Transparency, a Church, and Commitment to Raise a Christian

We need to think through the implications of what it means to be joined to Christ and therefore joined to one another. Paul highlights the fellowship that exists that provides the subsoil of reconciliation, not only by speaking the word koinonia, employing it in his language, not only by praying for Philemon, but he also does it by the transparency that he shows in acknowledging his own weakness in need. Four times in this little letter Paul refers to himself as imprisoned. He does it right at the start and he does it three other times - speaking of himself as a prisoner for Christ, or being imprisoned. As he announces his appeal for the first time, notice how he undergirds it: I, Paul, an old man, and now a prisoner also for Christ Jesus (Philemon 1:10)—a man who as they say, has more life behind him than in front of him, who is confined and can not even go and do what he would like to go and do. He acknowledges his weakness, and he opens himself up to being vulnerable to Philemon. He reminded him that he is not in a position to carry out everything he might like to do, and so he is appealing out of his weakness. In Philemon 1:21 we also see this fellowship expressed through confidence in Philemon - confident of your choice, your obedience, I write to you knowing that you will do even more than I say.  How could he say that? How can he write that? Because he has a relationship with Philemon in Christ, and so his confidence is based upon that fellowship, that reality of being in Christ, that he knows, that Philemon knows, that together they share.

Fellowship is not the only way that Paul speaks of the relationship that exists between him and Philemon; he also includes the church's involvement. He includes the church - did you notice this? He mentions Apphia and Archippus by name right at the beginning. Probably the wife and son of Philemon, and then he mentions the whole congregation:  the church, which is in your house (Philemon 1:2). He is writing a personal letter to Philemon, a member of the church, and he says, also to the church. Now, some people think that Paul includes the church here as a means of leverage, to subtly pressure Philemon to do what Paul wants him to do. That is not how I see it. I see this as simply an expression of the kind of fellowship that does actually exist among believers. Brothers and sisters, we need each other, and in the church we live together, helping one another live out our faith as we ought. It takes a church to raise a Christian. It takes a church for us to be able to have healthy spirituality. It takes brothers and sisters along with us, for us to follow Christ as we ought. You see, the business that Paul is writing about to Philemon to take care of, is not just his business; it is the whole church's business. The whole congregation has an interest in this because they are united in Christ. In our individualistic American culture, this kind of transparency and fellowship with brothers and sisters in Christ, may sound completely foreign and even a little bit scary, but that is what a church is. A church is made up of those who now are no longer strangers, but are family.

When you unite to Christ and unite to those who are also united to Christ in a church, you are committing yourself to live in fellowship, and you do so in at least two very important ways. You can make yourself live under the Lordship of Jesus Christ, and submit to your brothers and sisters who will help watch out for your discipleship. You welcome the church to help you live as Christ has called you to live. That is the first way. But you also commit yourself, you pledge yourself to help watch out for the discipleship of the other members of the church, and so we enter into this partnership. Church is not just something we do for an hour and a half on Sundays. It involves this acknowledgement of mutual dependence. That is the way the Lord intends for us to live, brothers and sisters. We need this to follow Christ as we ought. Untold numbers of missteps could be avoided if God's people would take this seriously. How many times has a Christian said, Oh, I am thinking about doing this, or, This looks like a good idea; I am going to make this a  life decision—and then just announce it to the church? They would have been better served to say, We are thinking about doing this; would you pray with us about this? Would you counsel with us? Perhaps, there may be things we are not considering? Seek the privileges and the blessings, the wisdom, that God has provided in the body as we live together. Brothers and sisters, we share our lives with one another, and we do so with the kind of confidence that acknowledges that our brothers and sisters love us as we seek to love them. And we ought to be willing to seek counsel, to seek correction, guidance, encouragement, knowing that we are among people who love us, who care for our souls, who want to help us follow Christ wisely. Paul taught that in all the churches where he went and ministered, so it is not surprising at all that he includes the church in this personal letter to Philemon.¹

Tom Ascol